Christmas with My Grumpy Ex: Feuding Hearts Christmas by Ja'Nese Dixon

Author:Ja'Nese Dixon [Dixon, Ja'Nese]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Purpose Prevails Publishing
Published: 2024-10-10T00:00:00+00:00

The crisp winter air bites at my cheeks as I step onto the ice at Wollman Rink. Amelia's hand is warm in mine, her excitement palpable as she takes in the twinkling lights and the giant Christmas tree at the center of the rink.

"Daddy, look! It's so pretty!" she exclaims, her eyes wide with wonder.

I smile down at her, my heart swelling with love. "It sure is, sweetpea. Are you ready to show off your skating skills?"

Amelia nods enthusiastically, and we start to glide across the ice. As we make our way around the rink, my eyes search for Ellie. I spot her near the entrance, lacing up her skates. She looks up, catching my gaze, and offers a small smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes.

As Ellie joins us on the ice, memories flood my mind unbidden. Laura and I used to come here every winter, twirling and laughing as we skated hand in hand. The last time we were here, Laura was pregnant with Amelia. We'd talked about bringing our daughter here someday, teaching her to skate just like my father had taught me.

The weight of those memories presses down on me, making it hard to breathe. I'm so lost in thought that I barely notice when Amelia lets go of my hand, skating ahead to join Ellie.

"Max?" Ellie's voice breaks through my reverie. "Are you okay?"

I blink, focusing on her concerned face. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just... remembering."

Understanding flashes in Ellie's eyes, followed quickly by a flicker of hurt. She nods, turning her attention back to Amelia. "Hey, sweetie, want to see if we can catch up to your dad?"

Amelia giggles, reaching for Ellie's hand. "Yeah! Let's race him!"

As they skate ahead, I watch them together. Ellie's patient guidance, the way she laughs at Amelia's jokes, the gentle way she steadies my daughter when she wobbles... it's everything I've ever wanted for Amelia.

Everything I once dreamed of having with Ellie.

But I can't escape the guilt.

I push off, skating to catch up with them. As I draw near, Amelia calls out, "Daddy! Watch this!" She attempts a small twirl, wobbling slightly but managing to stay upright.

"Great job, sweetpea!" I call out, grinning despite the turmoil in my heart.

Ellie claps, her face lit up with pride. "That was amazing, Amelia! You're a natural."

For a moment, as Amelia beams at us both, I allow myself to imagine that we're a real family. That Ellie is my wife, Amelia's mother, and we're just enjoying a perfect winter afternoon together. The longing I feel is so intense it's almost painful.

But then reality crashes back in. Ellie's smile fades as she meets my eyes, and I can see the walls she's built to protect herself.

Walls I put there with my own indecision and fear.

We continue skating, Amelia chattering away about school and her friends, oblivious to the tension between Ellie and me. Every time our hands brush as we help Amelia, every shared smile over her antics, it's like a jolt of electricity. I want so badly to pull Ellie close, to apologize for pushing her away, to tell her how I really feel.

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